A few weeks ago, I was hanging out with a few editor friends when the conversation turned into a roasting session of a PR team. I listened as one editor launched into a 30-minute tale of a press invite gone awry and how she “helped” that particular publicist by sending an email detailing all the things she’d done wrong, and how she could do her job better. 

The whole situation made me sad. I silently felt empathy for the poor publicist who had gotten thrown under the bus by this editor. We may think we know each other’s jobs, but do we really? I feel like it’s counterintuitive to talk negatively about publicists with editors, and vice versa—because at the end of the day, we’re all working toward the same goal. We want to share stories with the world.

In the spirit of Thanksgiving, this got me thinking about a gift I’d like to give to all my fellow writers, editors and publicists this holiday season: the benefit of the doubt. Wouldn’t this industry be a bit more pleasant to work in if we all strived to do this?

Look, we all have our moments. Everyone thinks at some point that “the other side” may say silly things, ask the same questions over and over, lose track of emails, send requests that are mistargeted and respond to emails in haste that, in hindsight, could (and should) have been avoided. But we all have a lot going on in our lives that prevents us from doing our jobs perfectly all the time.

The next time you find yourself in a frustrating situation with a freelancer or a publicist, I encourage you to slow down and consider (before responding!) how you could give this person the benefit of the doubt. For example: 

• Did that publicist totally butcher the name of your publication? Maybe she sent it from her phone, and it autocorrected the spelling.

• Did that writer really just ask me for the same WeTransfer photo link for the third time? Maybe she’s going through a hard family situation right now and has fallen behind (those links expire, you know!).

• Did that publicist send you yet another pitch for the same restaurant, after you’d already let him know you weren’t interested? Maybe he’s been dealing with a health issue lately and has forgotten who he’s reached out to about this client.

Careers are important. But we are all much more than our jobs: We are wives, husbands, sisters, brothers, daughters, sons, friends, parents, pet parents and much more. We are expected to take on more responsibilities in our roles than ever before, and we know first-hand that true work-life balance doesn’t really exist. Work is life, but life isn’t always work.

Let’s promise to give each other the gift of the benefit of the doubt this holiday season and into the new year ahead.

Wishing you many Thanksgiving blessings. I’m thankful for you!

What do you think: Are you up for giving this gift, too? Share your thoughts with me below.